The Horrifying Thought That People Might Do Things Without The Man With A Clipboard

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To actual adults this isn’t one of the great terrors of the world. To those whose mental development has been curtailed – at least as far as Freud determines it- such that they are anal retentives this is a disaster, an error about which something must undoubtedly be done. This mere idea that people might get on with things themselves without the intervention of that priestly caste of clipboard wielders:

The sight of unwanted furniture marked ‘free’ on our street corners has fast become commonplace as homeowners opt for a stress-free way to offload their possessions.

But fed up councils warn those who carry out the practice face the same punishments as litterbugs dumping fridges and mattresses in fly-tip hotspots.

Authorities say the rise of middle class fly-tipping has seen increasing numbers of cabinets, sofas and wardrobes left unattended outside homes, instead of previously being disposed of at charity shops and recycling centres.

The current mantra is that we should reuse where possible, recycle where not. Reuse is obviously going to be more efficient where transport of the items is less if not least. Swapping a sofa between neighbours is going to be more efficient than transporting it off to the town dump, there for it to be carried back to said neighbour.

But such simplicity threatens that caste of those with pencils to wield. The point being not that of efficiency at all from their point of view. The objection being that, well, if people do and can just get on with it themselves then what of the religious functions of those who oversee the rulz? As with the Catholic Church of old, leading a good life was not enough, one had to go through the rituals in order to have the life stamped as being a good one. Attendance, submission to authority, these were more important than alms and good morals. It is the verification which saves, not the actions.

And thus this insistence upon the imprimatur. Swapping junk isn’t the point at all, provision of jobs to the enlightened is. The answer is obvious too. We should never allow the anal retentives to have any power in our society. Which is as good a reason to leave the European Union as any…..

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